After an exciting night filled with loads of booze and fun, with your “best friend” of the opposite sex, chances are you might end up in bed with them.
No need to panic, since this has happened to the best of us. Now you might wonder yourself, was it the alcohol or do you two genuinely have feelings for each other?
Hello! He’s been your friend for ages. You could always talk to him about anything, he was always there for you. A real friendship!
Never in your dreams did you even think about having sex with him! And he never even tried to make a move at you.
A genuine sexual and intimate fling has never been mentioned or an option at all?
Now, that you ended up in bed together, you cant stop to ask yourself how this frisky incident might affect your friendship. And above all:
If it were up to you, the casual fling with your bff would not have to a one time event. After being intimately involved, with your best friend, romantic feelings may erupt.
You’ve already read about friends with benefits. How does this friendship plus sex without a relationship work?
But:
Most importantly:
Can a FWB relationship work for both of you, if you try to stick to the agreement?That’s what I want to tell you here! Take a look at the following five golden rules for friends with benefits right now.
By sticking to these rules, you might be able to pull off a successful FBW-fling, by no measure an easy undertaking. Be prepared to get involved with your platonic buddy and being able to distinguish between genuine romantic feelings and values of friendship.
Contents
Empathy is required
To avoid jealousy, you should not say a word about other bedtime stories
If you are dating other men, you should be careful that it is not one of his friends or colleagues.
You should not make eyes at other singles in his presence.
Of course, he shouldn’t make any demands, but you wouldn’t like this kind of behaviour either.
You don’t think that’s right somehow? You have the possibility to set other rules.
The more rules and exclusivity you want to build into a friends with benefits, the more it approaches a typical relationship.
Then you can really ask yourself why you shouldn’t just try it completely together …
What could possibly motivate you to deny him other sex contacts in a friends with benefits?
Actually, there are only two reasons that could speak against it for you:
- health reasons because of the risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases, or
- good old jealousy
You absolutely have to be free of the latter in a friends with benefits relationship. Otherwise it can’t work out!
As for your health …
Of course you have to trust your boyfriend – just as he has to be able to trust you that other, changing sexual partners will not cause an uncontrollable health risk for one or the other.
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Your time together
Do you enjoy spending quality time with each other, by going to the gym, eating out or checking in on the latest true-crime series on Netflix?
All those things, which friends do, you can now integrate into your romantic affair, while reaping all the benefits of a casual relationship.
Making out in public, holding hands in the city. It all feels great and is very romantic.
However, there are genuine couples who do enjoy these activities as well. So what distinguishes you guys from a classic romantic couple? What is the difference?
Generally, if you desire to be romantic with your partner, you might gradually get hung up in your feelings for him or her.
There is no need to make your nights together public among your friends.
This can result in annoying comments and encourage friends to keep interfering.
No need, to consult your friends for advice regarding this topic.
Be honest with each other
Heartbreak can be inevitable, even if you are not overly attached little towards him and don’t talk to him about your deep inner feelings. If its the “crush” is mutual, congratulations!
If not, you should end this love affair as soon as possible.
Because you can do whatever you want – it won’t be possible to suppress the feelings.
Worse still, the feelings will intensify more and more and the friendship will be at stake.
For this reason:
If you notice that you unexpectedly have more feelings for him, the only right step is to break off contact for a while – without compromise! If your feelings subside, you can try to get closer to him again and return to the old friendship.
Is it possible to return to a platonic friendship?
Obviously, the intent should be clear from the get go. Friends with benefits can be a great way of killing time and boredom – at least until authentic feelings may unfold.
One day, one of the participants will probably meet a new person of interest. That’s the end of the FWB-dating-phase which both will have to accept. Following this, will feel lonely and desperate.
However, if it doesn’t work out with the new relationship, a friend with benefits can be a powerful tool to get over a break-up.
Conclusion
A casual relationship among friends has its pros and cons.
If you are both aware of the risks and are still curious in indulging into this adventure, you should follow the rules mentioned above!
Hereby, nothing stands in the way of an enjoyable friend with benefits fling – at least as long it lasts or turns into true love.
